STOP 1: THE DRAGON LAUGHS

3:48am EST/ 15:48BST
PUDONG

so throughout the plane ride, i kept thinking that it would almost be awesome not to go. that this was going to be so difficult. that i could potentially run into some pretty awful circumstances that i wouldnt be able to get out of. the sense of foreboding didnt ebb as i was gathering my stuff to get off of the plane and onto the soil that ive wanted so badly to tread upon. you see, i didnt have a connecting ticket, i was told i would have to get one at the counter in shanghai - this only added to the anxiety. however, the second i stepped off of the plane and into the GINORMOUS airport (that is so so clean and designed to a T), i couldnt help but have a big stupid smile on my face.

i got through customs just fine, not without a little flirting with the official of course. the trouble really started when i wanted to get my connecting ticket. i waited in line and though i was reassured that they would all speak english, my girl and her neighbor did not. this is where i first kicked ass! "ying meiyou feiji piao." "SHENMA?!" "dui bu qi, women meiyou ni de ji piao, woman neng mai ni yi xin de piao" "bu shi, wo yijing mai yi chang feiji piao. zai meiguo, AA de ren gou su wo qu zhe li ye ba wo de piao. ru guo nimen zhen de meiyou, qing, gao su wo zai na li wo zao dao bang?" YES!!! translation? bitches, if you dont have my ticket you tell me who does! (only a lot nicer).

im now at an overpriced international center where im playing limited internet and plug in time. there are random plugs along the wall in the general airport, but theyre in really awkward places where guys with guns are walking around casually. so ill pay $4 for this amazing amazing mushroom soup and try to figure out how much to tip. do they tip in china? ughhhhh, so much i forgot to reference. i think i will pop into a bookstore (shu dian) to see if i can buy (mai) a loney planet guide or something... and then maybe a book cover so im not so obvious... bc my appearance isnt already lol.

if my calculations are correct, i still have 5 hours and three minutes to kill here. im tempted to see whats for dessert just so i can stay here longer... perhaps i will.

my next stop is beijing where i will be whisked away to [insert hotel here] to try to beat the jet lag before it beats me. im hoping that i dont get it. they gave me all day tomorrow to recover. im hoping that the combination of waking up early for a run on sunday morning, staying up all night on sunday night (i cant believe its already tuesday!), not sleeping on any planes and not trying too hard to think about what time it should be, perhaps i can one up this flaming doucheball they call jetlag.

i decided upon the green tea mousse cake. ITS DELICIOUS. everything ive had so far (soup and cake) has been seasoned perfectly. ohhhh fatness, how i embrace thee.